As you have probably been able to figure out over time, my mind works a little differently than most. So when most people think of their own show as having celebrity guest stars, maybe some singing and dancing, etc., my mind goes right to the dancing monkeys and trained gummy worms. Let’s face it, I can’t compete with Jay Leno when it comes to putting on a late show, I probably couldn’t even hold my own against Conan O’Brien. Sure I might be able to make people cry like Oprah, but it would probably be for the wrong reasons and I would be booted from any kind of daytime lineup. I do know music, but I’m pretty sure that I would be swallowed up by the likes of American Idol or The Voice, so that wouldn’t do. So what is there that nobody else is doing, and therefor no competition? Dancing monkeys and trained gummy worms. The best way to rise to the top of your field is to be the only one in it. It would be a spectacle to behold. My gummies are ready to premier their big act “Synchronized Necrosis.”

Come one, come all, prepare yourselves to be mystified, horrified, stupified, and disgustified by the spectacle of Joshua Swanagon and his trained Gummies, as they enthrall you with their tantalizing Dance Of Death.

Joshua and His Gummies

By mystified, horrified, stupified, and disgustified we really mean mildly amuzed, potentially bewildered.
By “tantalizing Dance Of Death” we really mean they play dead.
Due to the nature of this act, being a performance that you cannot unsee, there will be no refunds issued after witnessing “the spectacle” so don’t ask.
Void where prohibited by law, common sense and better judgment.