I remember when I was a kid, my uncle had been in a terrible motorcycle accident causing him to have to have his jaw wired shut. It was one of the weirdest things I had experienced at the time. I remember thinking he always sounded kind of angry because he was always talking through clenched teeth, but I got past that. However, he was over at our house one day making himself a couple peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for lunch. I happened to be in the kitchen and he asked if I would like one. Of course I want one, I’m seven. So, he finishes making them, and promptly sweeps them all up and throws them in the blender. I was horrified. I forgot about the jaw and having seen him eat his food up to that point with a straw. This was not what I had bargained for. Needless to say I didn’t have lunch with him that day. But, looking back, he was a man before his time. If you really think about it, all Cheese Whiz is, is blended cheese. Too bad he didn’t think of it then, he might have made millions.

Of course, it’s not too late for peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in a spray can, and let’s not underestimate the possibilities of Spam Whiz. I think I might be in the wrong field.